"It is possible to live happily in the here and now. Many conditions of happiness are available. We have no need to run into the future to get more, we just have to be aware of it."
Thich Nhat Hanh, Zen Buddhist teacher and introducer of "Mindfulness in the West.
What does it mean to live in the now? In short, living in the present moment means interpreting all our experiences as part of a set of unique sensations that only exist as such in the here and now. That means, for example, not having the belief that what we experience are more or less perfect copies of the precious moments, that they are anticipations of what we will experience in the future. In this way, you will not fall into the trap of believing that our whole life is due to our memories and to what we expect from the times to come (we appreciate our expectations, good or bad), and we appreciate what is going for us. happening as it is in the present moment.
6 keys to living in the present
From here we will see some basic guidelines to start incorporating this philosophy of life into our daily lives. Are you ready to start this journey?
1 - Accept everything that comes into your life.
One of the main principles of mindfulness involves focusing on the current moment, without making evaluations or making judgments about what is happening. It is about accepting experiences as they come, without putting a positive or negative label on them, living the now. For example, instead of describing a situation as sad, painful or exciting, you should simply focus on what you are experiencing, even if it is not pleasant for you. When we accept "negative" emotions, they lose some of their influence and power over us. Do not forget that in reality, most situations are not positive or negative, it is your expectations, experiences, and perceptions that tip the balance in one direction or another.
2 - Reflect and then act.
After having experienced the emotional part of the experience, it is time to focus on acting. Stop for a moment to think about what you have felt and why analyze if you need to change something and if it really is worth it. If so, what do you plan to do about it? How are you going to act? Before taking the next step, connect with your needs and goals in life, remember that impulsiveness is never a good counselor.
3 - Give up control.
The tendency to control everything that happens around us becomes a constant source of tension and stress. Therefore, if you want to fully live in the present, it is important that you assume that there are many situations that are beyond your control, over which you have very little influence. You must let the circumstances flow, so you will adopt a more relaxed attitude that will allow you to be open to the opportunities that arise.
4 - Savor every moment.
Sometimes we compare the sensations we are experiencing with those we have experienced in the past or with those we might experience in the future. However, this tendency to compare makes the present escape us, we cannot enjoy it. Therefore, it is essential that you remember that each moment is unique, live it as if it were the first and the last. It is also recommended that you do only one task at a time and spend as much time as you need. The key to savoring every moment is to do less but enjoy more.
5 - Get rid of preconceptions.
Prejudices are one of the main barriers that prevent us from enjoying the present because they make us face situations assuming preconceived response patterns that leave no room for spontaneity. Therefore, living in the present also implies opening yourself to new experiences that are truly in tune with your needs and desires. In fact, you will be surprised to discover that with the practice of mindfulness, those activities that previously seemed routine and devoid of beauty, begin to show a much more pleasant facet, hitherto unknown.
6 - Carpe Diem.
This Roman phrase that means "Take advantage of the moment" reminds us of the ephemeral nature of life and the need to take advantage of each day, each moment, live in the present and give life to our days, knowing that our lives are numbered.
These days we are in a completely atypical situation, practically all human beings are locked in our houses to protect ourselves from Covid-19, but nobody said that these days of confinement have to be boring. We already know that we must maintain the living space, that is, stay away from other human beings to prevent the spread of the virus, but that does not mean that you cannot make funny plans with your partner to spend the days. If you are running out of ideas of what to do with your partner during lockdown I will give you some, it's like playing when we were kids but without toys, even though we still need to keep using our imagination to have fun.
Spa Day at Home
By creating a pleasant, wellness-oriented environment in the house itself, we will have a space on hand to spend a good spa day with your partner. It is a good way to set yourself a time for pause and connection, where you can share something nice, connect and talk about pending issues or make good plans.
Dialogues in a loving and pleasant context can be much more productive and enjoyable. Thinking about generating a family spa day at home can also be a good plan, where everyone has fun and generates a moment of encounter and shared pleasure.
It entertains boys and also helps them learn that there are times when it is good to stop and connect with the body and emotions. Especially the girls, they love it. So much so that there are already themed birthdays that propose a home spa for children, where the girls have a great time.
Yoga and Meditation
Doing yoga exercises for couples is a different and fun way to take advantage of all the benefits of yoga for the body and mind while helping to strengthen and improve the relationship by sharing an extraordinary experience together. Yoga exercises for couples require teamwork and mutual trust. The results of your work depend on the support you receive from your partner and vice versa, it is important that both of you take into account some aspects that are essential for each session to be a unique experience.
Breathing is the basis of the success of any yoga class, because breathing with awareness will allow the body to focus on each movement and find the the effort necessary to carry out each asana. In couples yoga the breath should not be individual, both participants should strive to make the rhythm of their breaths as similar as possible, as it is the only way that energy can flow through the body with fluidity and calm.
Each partner yoga participants must have full control of their body and body control of their companion. This will allow both of you to relax and be able to perform the poses correctly. So let go of the tensions, trust and let go.
You should not try to go beyond what your body allows, otherwise you may injure yourselves or your partner. The intention of doing yoga with a couple is to connect, enjoy together, stop being two and be only one.
Concentration is essential for everything to go well. Since the breathing of the two must flow in the same tune, the same must happen with both bodies. Your yoga partner should be alike your dance partner.
Romantic Dinner at the Balcony
If you have a balcony, terrace, a garden at home, make yourself a "restaurant setting" with lights and candles and share a nice evening with your partner, you both must dress as if you are going outside to it makes you feel more like a real dinner. You don't need to spend a lot of money to have a beautiful and memorable evening.
Take care of setting the house for the romantic night: The dim light and the aromas are very important to create a romantic atmosphere. On the other hand, you must take into account how you will set the table. Try to put the seats next to each other, especially if the table is large. Choose tablecloths, cutlery, dishes, and some decorations.
Don't forget to make a playlist that sounds soft - as background music, the idea is to be able to chat and feel you are somewhere else - in which you can include music that both of you like, and logically, disconnect television, cell phones, computers, and other devices that may be distracting.
And the food? Without a doubt, if it is going to be a romantic dinner, one of the essential points is the food. There are thousands of healthy menu options. If you give yourself a little trickery, try that the dishes are decorated, or at least served in a beautiful way. Don't forget about the drinks: water, a soft drink, and according to preferences wine, champagne, beer or a cocktail should not be missing.
Carisma Spa & Wellness International has been offering a superior service in 5-star hotels, holiday luxury resorts and thalasso centres along the Aegean and the Mediterranean coast of Turkey and Malta since 1990.